I miss you. So . . . bloody . . . much. It stings a little honestly. I have just enough free time here, that every once in a while, I get really bad Zephram Withdrawl. It's kinda funny, honestly, when I stop and try and figure out why I like you and why you're my boyfriend. . . I realize how deep it goes . . . and how, at least for me, like is a lot deeper. In fact, it's love. The more I discover of you, the more I see, the more I find myself falling farther and further in love with you. Like Alice down the rabbit hole. It's never intentional and I never realize how far I've fallen until I look up. I've asked myself why many, many times. And I can never come to an answer. I used to think it was because it was because I didn't know why. But now I realize I do know why, but I still can't give an answer. Why? Because there isn't just one. Some days, it's purely physical, I admit that freely, there's something about your eyes that has always just gotten to me and . . . melted me, while at the same time I am frozen in place. Other days, other hours, it's the warmth in you, your gentle touch and your love of all things small. Other days, it's your interests and I don't mind watching hours and hours of anime or watching you game, or show me Japanese or physics, or math. Other days, it's your voice, soothing, calming, with a hint of . . . not steel exactly, but strength, I think. Confidence. Other days, it's definitely your communication skills, intelligence, and the conversations we have. And sometimes it's your strength. Your passion towards the world and your ability to want to make things right. Other days, it's your softness. The romantic lull in your voice (okay, that one's an often. Guilty). Other times, it's the same romance, but without the softness. The pure desire of it all. But there is so much more to you than even that -- your political side, which just now I am beginning to appreciate, your sense of humor and your sillyness (ditto, your love of cooking, ultimate frizbee, trains, and a million other things that I've never thought to think about in the same way. Your love of children, an excellent book, a well made sword, astronomy, the dark of the night, philosophy . . . I could go on for a long, long time. I am so grateful and honored to be your girlfriend, particularly under the circumstances and the strain we have been put under. And I wanted to acknowledge that I think you're amazing. Truly. And I love how far we've come and how I've come to know you. And also though, that I hope we have many, many more adventures together and I get to know you even better. -kiss-
I love you. You are so much a part of me -- you are so much too, a friend, a best friend, a boyfriend and much more. I'm going to stop writing now, since you've distracted me, but I love you. I love you. I love you.
